The end is near. BoyGenius (BG) wants to take his driving road test. GULP.
I do not want him to take this test. Why? Here are a few reasons….actually, here are some things he has said while practising his driving with me. [I am NOT making this stuff up]
What you do NOT want to hear when your 16-year-old son is learning to drive:
1. [Spoken while shoulder checking]…”You know, mom, when I’m shoulder checking, I’m just turning my head around. I’m not looking at anything.”
2. [After cruising through a 4-way-stop in our neighbourhood WITHOUT stopping]….”Was I supposed to stop there? My bad.”
3. [His cell phone rings. Yep, he answers it!!]…”Hello? Sorry, I can’t talk right now. I’m driving. Peace out.” [The peace does go out at that moment as I start yelling at him about answering his phone!]
4. [At a major intersection, we are first in the left turning lane. The light is RED] …”Can I go now?”
5. [During one of our many practice sessions] …”When are you and dad going to buy me a car?” [I pretty much laugh out loud at this one]
6. [After I laugh about him asking for a car]…”There is no point in me practising my driving if you’re not buying me a car!”
7. [During an angry silence]…”You know, when I get my own car, you will have no control over me, and you won’t know where I am.” [Well then. Now we will DEFINITELY buy him a car.]
8. [After I correct a number of the above mistakes]…”Stop telling me what to do! I know how to drive!!”
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| I’ll stop telling him how to drive when he figures out what this sign means! |
The REALLY scary thing?? I know there LOTS more teenage boys out there driving who are just like him!
After I post this blog, I’m going to dye my hair, which has now gone completely grey.
And then I’m going to slash the tires on my minivan…
Michelle
August 2, 2011 at 9:00 am (13 years ago)OMG! This gave me a fit of giggles Kelly! You have my deepest sympathy! I can just picture him saying thses things…and watching you go paler by the second LOL! I feel your pain sista…I feel your pain!
Natasha
August 2, 2011 at 3:51 pm (13 years ago)LOL!!!! I don’t know if I should continue reading your blog because you scare the hell out of me with your stories! Is this what I have to look forward to?! LOL. Buy a few more bottles of hair color because it ain’t over yet! LOL
misty
August 2, 2011 at 4:14 pm (13 years ago)Oh my goodness…I’m with Natasha! I don’t think I can handle the teenage years! Funny stuff!
Micupoftea~
August 2, 2011 at 4:25 pm (13 years ago)Ummm, on the one hand this is funny! On the other, he not only puts others at danger he puts himself in danger. In the last 4 years of driving my daughter to high school, I have been rear ended and sideswiped by TEEN drivers near the high school!!! Two different accidents I had to take my car in for repairs.grrr… I am so glad dd has graduated so I can stay away from the HS!!! LOL~ Some 16 yr olds are mature enough to drive, but most are not. Get out the hair color, it is going to be a bumpy ride! xo
Cindy Gay
August 2, 2011 at 6:05 pm (13 years ago)I’d like to say it gets better. . . . . at least you can talk to your on line friends about it!
Renee VanEpps
August 3, 2011 at 4:33 am (13 years ago)HA!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG .. How could he NOT be looking at anything when shoulder checking???!!!
And the ‘my bad’ for no.2 is hilarious. I am scared that this is my future as well!! hee hee..
Lee-Anne
August 3, 2011 at 12:40 pm (13 years ago)I have two that are now adults and married so I feel for you and know your pain. I still have an 11 year old at home. What was I thinking LOL. Just kidding! I love him dearly, but why can’t they just skip the teen years and go from 10 to 25 instantly? Chin up Kelly.
Ivana Camdzic
August 4, 2011 at 8:51 am (13 years ago)O boy! In a really that’s-just-how-it-goes kind of way, this is just hilarious! It was not that long ago that my lil brother was taking his driver’s test, and I had sworn that if he passed I would become a hermit – for fear of losing my life should I ever be in a 500 foot radius of his ill-operated car…Much to my surprise, when he failed the test TWICE, he somehow changed his outlook on what driving really means. Funny how things just have a way of working themselves out 🙂
scrapbookertink
August 4, 2011 at 11:45 am (13 years ago)LOL, this is too funny, DD is starting in October, god help me!
Sandra D
August 4, 2011 at 12:16 pm (13 years ago)Kelly, you are a brave and patient Mom. My version of Mom’s driving school would have been shut down after the first or second incident. Please remember to give me a call when he is on the road so I can stay home (just kidding).
Chantal Vandenberg
August 4, 2011 at 2:31 pm (13 years ago)Yikes!!! Funny post though! 😀
reneabouquets
August 7, 2011 at 4:41 am (13 years ago)Guess what Kelly? My son is now one of those teenage boys out there driving! Yep, he hit the road 2 days after his birthday that was June 25th. I am so lucky, Draven is the total opposite of what teenagers are supposed to be. He is very responsible and drives better than me. I loved this post-so funny! So many of my friends are going through this so it is very relatable! I found a great hair color that lasts a lot longer than the others, if you would like the name of it-lol!!
Lisa Barrie
August 7, 2011 at 10:22 am (13 years ago)OMG Kelly, I’m sitting here with my 12 year old DD and tears of laughter are rolling down my face. I am seriously dreading this too! I wish you the best of luck and new tires are expensive..just let the air out!
Pendra
August 7, 2011 at 10:45 pm (13 years ago)I went through it with two teenagers years ago and I went completely white haired… now my grandkids are starting to drive… YIKES, I think my hair is actually starting to fall out!!! So quit gripping about hair dye… I gotta go look at wigs! Love ya gal, you keep my heart pumping with all your great humor!
Pendra
Pendra
August 8, 2011 at 12:58 am (13 years ago)Oh Kelly… you are so sweet! I just got your message about the loss of my Mom. Your kind words and friendship mean a lot to me and I so appreciate you and your wonderful sense of humor. There are so many amazing people out here in blog land and I am ever so grateful to have found you. You are ever so sweet. Thank you my friend.
Pendra
Brenda Cazes
August 9, 2011 at 5:56 pm (13 years ago)This is too funny….and a little scary seeing as we live in the same city!! I was laughing out loud as I read them, but number one has got to be my favorite! Thanks for the laugh today – I needed it!! – Brenda
Izzyb
August 10, 2011 at 2:52 pm (13 years ago)You sure know how to bring the funny, Kelly. I wanted to laugh, but then, before I know it, my own son will be driving. Maybe I should just print this out and put it in his baby book now.
By the way, when I was a teen, I told my Dad that STOP stood for Squeal Tires On Pavement. He was not amused…
Marivic (Berry71Bleu)
August 12, 2011 at 9:47 am (13 years ago)Kelly,
Thanks for your lovely comment on my blog..I was trying to find an email address so I can email you. Can you email me at berry71bleu@gmail.com? Thank you so much!! Lovely work Kelly, I’m now a follower..Hope to hear from you soon.
Sharon (Fritchey)
August 14, 2011 at 2:03 pm (13 years ago)LOL!!!! My 17 year old daughter and her dad and I – we pretty much have the same conversations!!!!!!